Erata, My Head Wound, Hash Browns, Football, Work etc...

Sooooo a lazy Sunday of a little church, a little football, a lot of food. Not a bad day. Looking forward to a pizza party tonight with some crappy charity pizza. Seriously, why does charity pizza that they get together and make have to suck so much? I don't know either.

Watching the Rams play an excellent but what looks to be futile game against the hated New Orleans Saints. They are not really hated. I like Drew Breese and I am impressed that Reggie Bush looks to have gotten his head out of the hookah and it is something watching him accelerate. The Mizzou Tigers won yesterday convincingly breaking a hex that K-State had on them for 5 years. If they can win another they are bowl bound I would think but winning out would do it for them and it is conceivable that they might do so. There are 5 teams rolling on unbeaten right noiw with Alabama, Florida, Texas, Cincinnati, Boise State and.... wait for it....wait for it.... THE TEXAS CHRISTIAN HORN FROGS. TCU, terror of the Mountain West have been dismantling opponents all year. It is hard to argue that they are as good as Texas, Alabama or Florida but I will. The Frogs beat Virginia and Clemson early, had a quality win against a good Air Force team and dismantled BYU 38-7. Absent a stumble they will go undefeated. Cincy has Illinois and Pittburgh which are possible losses, But Boise State should also win out. This is wear the BCS sucks it but it would appear that TCU and Boise might get in BCS bowls. The SEC will force the Gators to play The Crimson Tide so someone will have a loss and Texas is likely to roll but could still lose a game. We will see how it shakes out.

My head wound seems to be healing with the excellent stitches that Dr. Hurst put in. I am looking forward to wearing a big stupid bandage on my head all week and being an even larger objet of derision (it could happen). The Doctor yelled at me for quite some time about keeping it covered and not letting the stitches dry out....yuck. My dogs have enjoyed the oozing of the wound (for any of you who remember "Horrible Head Wound Harry" from the old Saturday Night Live skit. Probably not the best way to keep the wound moist.











My intense battle with depression have been well documented, clinically studied and yet remain untreated. More often then not recently these bouts with the morose are brought on by my inability to cook hash browns for my own taste at my home. I have failed well over 20 times...maybe 30 over the past 5 years. Totally a disaster every time. I am reasonably certain (and I do not mean to offend) that I am much more likely to find a cure for cancer or solve global warming or... figure out how to get my kids not to text other people when talking to me, then make decent hash browns at home. As you will recall I have...issues, possibly religious issues regarding hash browns. I LIKE THEM SHREDDED! I like to have them in a rough patty shape and be crispy on both sides. Currently only two places in town have hash browns that I find pleasing. Spencers Grill in Kirkwood (thin, greasy, delicious) and Pomme in Clayton (classic rough cut steak house hash browns). Sadly I have been unable to replicate them at home. With the whole family (and the Kukla's) coming over for PORKFEST on Thanksgiving morning (including the venerable Pat Kukla of the Quad Cities) there is going to be a lot pressure to produce quality hash browns. Today I bought some red boiling potatoes. I boiled them. I let the cool to room temperature. I shredded them, I soaked them in a little salt water. I drained them. I heated a beautiful cast iron skillet to medium. I coated it with a little PAM spray on. I dropped them in. They sizzled. They sucked. I ended with a brownish, black...goop. Thus...further depression and despondance. It is hard to type with this gun in my mouth. Pray for me.

Tomorrow I have to go back to work. Very sad. And they say winter is coming back. Over the weekend the area seemed to be flooded with birds and I saw 7 different flights of geese heading south. They know. The party is over and it is time to start the long hard slog through St. Louis winter. The thought of those hours working downtown and staring out at the gray St. Louis skyline...chilling.

Diner Review IX: The Buttery

Diner Review
The Buttery
3659 South Grand Boulevard
St. Louis 63118
314-771-4443

It was with some trepidation on a recent Sunday that I finally made the journey to “The Buttery.” Clearly there was a lot of fear just regarding the name. Certainly there should be no fear in too much butter. There can never be too much butter, or too much grease. As the Diner Reviewers “Home Boy” Martin Luther said...”We hold these truths to be self evident.” No, the fear had to do with the type of building and the location on South Grand. The fear was that there might be a dreaded butter “substitute.” That evil, vicious, yellowish oil that is “butter flavored.” This crap has ruined more breakfasts and frankly more restaurants then any other evil besides “butter like spreads.”

Not to fear. The Buttery provided an excellent breakfast, free of butter substitutes. Unlike some diners that I have traveled to, The Buttery is in a true racially diverse neighborhood. A neighborhood not of all one ethnicity. A neighborhood that is in transistion but know one knows whether it is transitioning from something bad to something good...or vice-versa. The Buttery stands in it’s own free standing lot wedged between an old office building and a Blockbuster. There is metered street parking on Grand and a small lot behind where you would not want to leave your lap top on the seat while you were dining.
Going in you notice all the good things. A grill driectly behind the counter and a long straight counter with a dozen stools with red pleather all ready for a big butt to plunk down on. There are also several two person booths (dueces) and about 5 four people booths. The booth benches and tables are made of the appropriate wood grained plastic that gives a person a feel of quality.... or not. There were no calendars on display which is troubling but a CD juke box was available. On this trip the repetoir on the jukeb ox was not reviewed.

The staff was comprised of a 50 year old lady, a 40 year old man and another lady who was mildly impaired of an indeterminate age. They were not overly friendly (likely because they were busy or perhaps because they were unfriendly) but they did meet every request this diner made quickly and without rancor. There was some friendly banter between the man and the woman along the lines of “when I want shit from you I will squeeze your head.” Good stuff.

The menu is a one page, two sided, yellow laminated presentation which once again stinks of diner quality and professionalism. They have all the important items available for breakfast including a slinger although it was not sampled. The gravy was acceptable and had good flavor although it was slightly gluey and did not contain a lot of sausage or any other meat. The biscuit with the gravy was covered in gravy, unidentifiable due to same and unremarkable other then as a medium for the gravy. Nothing wrong with that.
The hash browns need to be discussed. They are shredded hash browns (the importance of which has been frequently discussed in these pages) but the shreds are thick, more like a Nightcrawler then an Alabama Red Jumper. This leads to a slightly more “meaty” hashbrown patty, and it was a hashbrown patty. It appears that The Buttery uses the Waffle House hash brown form (when you do not order them “scattered”) and as such you hash browns come out in a round patty, about an inch thick, pleasantly brown on both sides. All in all I would have to call the hash browns...out standing.

Brakfast sausage patties were smallish and pre-formed but had excellent flavor. The iced tea was questionable as to what week it had been brewed in but over all I would say that was my only complaint regarding “The Buttery.” In 2006 the RFT voted it Best Diner saying:

Best Diner (2006)
“For so long, we've had so many questions about the Buttery. What kind of a diner name is that? Does anybody actually go in there? And most important, why haven't we gone in there? So we did, and we weren't disappointed. The Buttery boasts one of the best cheap breakfasts in town (served anytime, 24/7). The vibe is mellow (and almost otherworldly, the way everything else seems to fall away as soon as you walk in the door). Then again, there's a kick-ass jukebox stocked with a surprising and wicked array of metal and other high-volume hits to jolt yourself back into reality. And the reality is, whether you're looking for a well-done burger, a tuna melt or your standard eggs-potatoes-toast combo, the Buttery's...well, Best.”
While the RFT vote of “Best” is impressive (i.e. Best Fried Chicken, Kentucky Fried Chicken)

I was more impressed when doing my research to discover it was mentioned as a possible stop for a “Bad Girls Road Trip” in a lesbian website called “Curves.”
http://www.curvemag.com/Detailed/106.html

Can there be higher kudos then the picked breakfast place for a bad girl lesbian road trip? I think not. As is my habit now I gave the diner a second visit with a guest in order to confirm my “findings”. I am after all a professional and must impose rigorous methodology to my efforts. This “personal discipline” is the hallmark of my blog and of course...my life. The Buttery disappointed on my second trip. The iced tea was old, (from at least the night before and then left in a walk in if I am any judge...and I am), the hashbrowns still in their puch shape but undercooked and the bacon...average. My breakfast companion ordered the slinger (with sausage) and was pleased although it was served with beans which pleasing to some I find...distasteful at beakfast.

I was able to visit with the jukebox however and generally found it pleasing. It is one of the CD models and has a a large selection of country and classic rock. On a strong hangover it might be just the thing.
I will keep an eye on The Buttery in the future but for now...6 Slingers on the 10 scale.

Diner Review VIII: The Sunrise Diner

Sunrise Diner
146 N Main St
Edwardsville, IL 62025
(618) 659-8688


Soooo...we venture to Illinois again this time to The Sunrise Diner which is in downtown Edwardsville and just happens to be right across the street from my law firm. The Sunrise has great ambience and sits right on the street which is cool. It sits in a row of shops with a Wine Bar and the much dreaded Bryan Cave and is right on Main Street and hard to miss. With its unassuming glass-front window and chalkboard sandwich board outside, it does not impress. Inside the restaurant is kept fairly clean by the owners, and it is obvious that this diner has only been open a couple years.

“The furniture is rather new, the tables in good condition”. I read this in an online review and find it... a poor recounting of the place. Everything is blond wood and kind of lost in the 70’s. It looks vaguley like grandmas kitchen. Although they have a smoking section the persnickety among us will notice that the smoke permeates, upsetting some people and making the rest of us certain that we are at least in a diner. I think Illinois is supposed be going totally smokeless even in bars. I am a non smoker but that stinks of communism to me. There is almost no space to walk amongst the tables and the service is, well, diner service. I object because there is no grill and no counter with stools but I give some breaks for more rural Diners. There is no jukebox. Fortunately there is also no internet.

On a normal weekday morning you can count on seeing the police chief in his booth in the corner just enjoying his breakfast, holding court and taking things in. I do not know what he gets but he drinks a lot of coffee and tends to keep to himself unless one of his friends shows up. I have had breakfast there on about 4 occasions now, normally on a Monday morning and although the service is relatively indifferent and not particularly attentive it is more then adequate.

It is quite the combination. The cream gravy is passable, a little thick and pasty but with some decent flavor. The sausage appears to be local and home made. The hash browns...shredded as God intended and cooked pretty perfectly on a consistent basis. Good stuff. The pancakes are thick and wide and they serve them with plenty of buter and syrul. Try the gyro breakfast platter, generally I am not one for Greek food but all the food is rather good. An average breakfast will run you less than $7.

Diner Review II: Big Ed's Chile Mac Diner on Pine

OK...so it has been brought to my attention rather forcefully...by "readers" if they can indeed read, from as far away as California...that...well...there just have not been many Diner reviews. Mea Culpa. I have taken a LOT of great Diner pics and started strong with discourses regarding definitions of a DINER and the imprtance of shredded hashbrowns but a hark and alas...I have strayed...lacking purpose and focus and as such I must return, as it were, to the fold. (tortured sentence structure?)

Big Ed's Chile Mac Diner is indeed a lion among the St. Louis Diner elite. It is one of the former O.T. Hodges Chile Parlous which suffered a rather disasterous family break up causing the chain to disappear...forever under the St. Louis landscape...never to return....at least to the city of St. Louis. One hollow shell of the old place exists. If you hit the O.T. Hodge web site where they use to have 6 or 7 St. Louis locations they now tell you:

"O.T. Hodge Chile Parlors®, founded at the St. Louis World's Fair in 1904, is enjoying its 103rd continuous year of operation in 2007. Our acclaimed Chile formula, our unique menu, and our affordable pricing have made O.T. Hodge one of the favorite restaurant operations in St. Louis. We are continually rated number one for Chile in St. Louis, and just as consistently rate among the top local restaurant chains for take-out and fast-food popularity.

Our customers represent a wide range. Executives, secretaries, service people, public servants, production workers, judges and families meet at Hodges for breakfast, lunch or dinner. Our wide, affordable menu, prompt table service and clean looks have made us a leader in our field for a century. Come visit us at our new Ferguson, MO location, 250 South Florissant Road. This is 1.25 miles north of Interstate 70 on Florissant Road. It is near the St. Louis Airport."

This Diner reviewer says..."whatever."

Big Ed's keep the tradition with the location on Pine right across the street from Metropolitan Square. There is another one with the same name on North Broadway but this reviewer has not been there and they are...on information and belief...owned by different people. At the end of the day you judge a diner by it's "regulars." Along with my "Artist In Residence" status at the afor reviewed Courtesy on Hampton I am a regular at Big Ed's because it is...after all...right across the street from work. And they have a lot regulars that they take good care of and know by name.

Big Ed's on Pine open at 5:30 every day. For breakfast Charlotte mans the grill and Donna serves customers. A lot of customers. They pack them in and know the orders of their regulars. tehre are several business men and woman, several service companies (elevators and electricians) seem to have work group meetings there. There are always two huge black men sitting at the counter at 7:30 every morning. I mean huge. At that time of morning along with Charlotte and Donna is Lamont who...as near as I can figre does...nothing. But he is a really nice guy as he putters around and smokes.

Big Ed's has classic Diner configuration with a counter running the length of it and 5 groupsings of tables each of which seat 6. If you are a table person (and I am) staking out your position and discouraging other people from disturbing your newspaper reading is a sport similar to blocking out under the boards and playing for position ion the paint. On most mornings it is not a problem but things become dicey when a really big convention hits town. Especially if it is one that comes back every year because people look forward to coming back to good diners and then...sometimes...you throw up your hands as the line extends out the door.

They have great and perfect breakfasts... Charlotte does an awesome job on the grill with the eggs and they have a certain sausage I have not found anywhere else that is simply an excellent breakfast country sausage. They of course have the slinger and serve Edmunds Chile with or without beans. They serve chile, chile mac, chile three ways, they have tamales for the top one... and on information and belief they have an awesome slinger. The Bacon report is...average to poor. It is a weak spot on the menu and my theory is that because their sausage is so good there is not the volume of bacon needed on the grill to make a good consistent product. Additionally...and sadly their hashborwns are not hash browns but the dreaded "breakfast potatoes." I have had the discussion with them many times regarding this egregious shortcoming but for one reason or another (they say these potatoes stand up better to chile) they are not going to change. Of more import to me they have a really thick cream gravy (though a little light on sausage chunks) which i can get with some patties and their breakfast potatoes and make an excellent heavy breakfast. They also do a very nice sausage sandwich...with or without onions...always with American cheese...like God intended.

There are some serious questions regarding their Diner "bonafides" primarily because of their hours. They open early and are closed by 2...or 2:30 though I have been known to get an iced tea there as late as 3. Additionally and showing how beholden they are to the 9-5 crowd and how St. louis rolls up it's streets downtown on the weekend...they are CLOSED. So the hours suck..but the food is good and the service is GREAT. If you don't get the slinger get the biscuits and gravy with a side of sausage. 8 Slingers out of 10 for the rating.